Imposter syndrome and a DJ playlist called “The Gabby Mix”
Gabby mix | March 2026
Imposter syndrome and a DJ playlist called “The Gabby Mix”
How often do we create limitations for ourselves that quietly prevent us from reaching our full potential?
I’ve recently found my way back to the book The Courage to Be Disliked by Ichiro Kishimi and Fumitake Koga. It’s a book I often recommend to my coachees, especially those who struggle with imposter syndrome or people pleasing.
There’s a chapter titled “Is an inferiority complex an excuse?”. This chapter really made me pause and reflect. It raises a powerful question:
How often do we create limitations for ourselves that quietly prevent us from reaching our full potential?
Sometimes these limitations disguise themselves as humility, caution, or “being realistic”. But underneath, they can actually be a form of self-protection, keeping us safely within the boundaries of what feels familiar.
Meet “Gabby”
At one point in my life, my imposter syndrome had a name.
Gabby.
Ironically, Gabby was also my dance alias (that’s a story for another time). I even had a DJ friend create an entire playlist called “The Gabby Mix.” You can imagine how awkward it was when I eventually had to tell him that Gabby wasn’t actually my real name.
But we digress. The more interesting Gabby was the voice in my head, the one whispering doubts like:
“You’re not ready.”
“You’re not experienced enough.”
“You don’t belong here.”
As an exercise, I was once encouraged to name my imposter. The idea was simple but surprisingly powerful. By naming that voice, I could separate it from my identity.
Imposter syndrome is normal. Most high-achieving people experience it at some point. The goal isn’t necessarily to eliminate it entirely. It is to change your relationship with it. Reframing, per se.
So, I imagined sending Gabby somewhere far, far away into the bush where she could no longer sit on my shoulder narrating my decisions.
And interestingly…Gabby rarely shows up these days.
Are our limitations self-imposed?
One of the most challenging ideas in The Courage to Be Disliked is that sometimes we unconsciously hold onto our limitations because they serve a purpose.
If we believe we’re “not good enough,” we don’t have to risk failure.
If we believe we’re “not ready,” we don’t have to step into the unknown.
If we believe we’re “not the kind of person who does that,” we avoid discomfort.
But those beliefs can quietly keep us small.
So here’s an exercise for this month.
If this resonates with you, try this simple reflection:
Notice the voice of doubt
What does it usually say?
Give it a name
Ask yourself: Is this a fact, or is this fear?
Take one small action anyway
Giving doubt a name can create distance between you and the narrative.
Courage doesn’t mean the doubt disappears; it just means we move forward despite it.
Your courage might not look dramatic. Sometimes it’s simply continuing when things feel uncomfortable. My cousin from Uganda recently graduated with her MBA, and someone wrote a public message celebrating her. They said she was a living testimony that strength is not loud. Sometimes it’s simply the quiet decision to keep moving forward despite the odds.
A question to reflect on this month:
What might you attempt if you didn’t believe the limiting story you tell yourself?
And if that voice of doubt appears, you can always send it somewhere far away.
Gabby certainly doesn’t get much airtime these days. Unless it’s the ‘Gabby Mix’ playing heavy baselines through my headphones.
This week I have been…
Reading: The Courage to Be Disliked by Ichiro Kishimi and Fumitake Koga https://amzn.to/4lh865y
Watching: Blue Therapy (Netflix) with all its couple drama
Listening: “The Gabby Mix” by Emerzy Corbin, as an ode to an old imposter friend named Gabby https://www.dropbox.com/scl/fi/wy4xmnl39ety1s4noo5hq/Gabbimix.mp3?rlkey=x2kmxrgzs5kbbnbh0gsecbpg1&st=aj9pqdso&dl=0
If you found this reflection useful, forward it to one person who would appreciate it. Thank you and see you next month.